7 Things I Learned on My Trip to Denver

1. Southwest Airlines has a system.

These columns are part of the system. Oh, yeah there's a system.
These columns are part of the system. Oh, yeah there’s a system.

I don’t really know what it is. It involves columns. It involves the letters A, B, C and numbers 1-5, 6-10…. see the pattern? It goes up to 30 and then sometimes up to 60. And they call the A’s to stand by the columns and then they call the B’s but sometimes they don’t call the B’s so if you are a B, you don’t know to line up so you just stand up and walk on the plane. Probably to the consternation of the other B’s who were waiting at their columns. Or you hear that the C’s are being asked to line up and you know you are C6 so you go take your place even though there are other people standing there. I don’t know if they wanted me or not, I just got on the plane. Of course Southwest is really nice and they didn’t mind my system.

2. My sister’s condo has an incredible view.

My sister, Katie,  moved to Denver two years ago and I finally got my arse down there to see her. My brother and I went this past weekend because we were going to go for Thanksgiving but airfare was insane so we did Thanksgiving early. Katie has talked about her view and posted photos on Facebook but until I saw it, I didn’t fully appreciate what she’s got going on. For $1250 including utilities she can see a bunch of the Rocky Mountains, the downtown skyline, Coors Field, and the Colorado State Capitol building. Not. Too. Shabby.

View from Katie's patio during the day.
View from Katie’s patio during the day.
And at night.
And at night. I was having wine so I may have needed a tripod to keep the camera steady. You get the idea. Don’t judge me.

3. Katie has a darling house.

Katie is very handy and crafty and loves projects. Apparently when she moved in her condo had a Murphy bed and all the walls were striped blue and yellow. She got her furniture from Portland last month (it was originally a furnished rental) and now her house looks like this!!!

Walls painted. New couch from Pottery Barn. Rocker from my mom's side of the family.
Walls painted. New couch from Pottery Barn. Rocker from my mom’s side of the family.

4. Denver is really dry.

Thursday night when I got to Katie’s house, I was kind enough to point out to her “your hands are really dry.” I continued my feeling of superiority until I awoke the next morning and found that all of the moisture had been sucked out of my body. I then spent the rest of my time there putting on hand lotion, squeezing saline up my nose and then blowing my nose non-stop. Apparently you adjust to that if you live in Denver.

5. Thanksgiving dinner is good anytime

On Friday, Katie and I were a little “tired” sometimes when we haven’t seen each other for awhile, we get so excited that the next day we wind up a bit “tired”.  Despite our “exhaustion”, we made a damn fine Thanksgiving dinner served at the table we used to eat at when we were growing up. We aren’t clear on how six of us sat at this table but we did and we had food on the table and plates and stuff. No idea how we fit.

Six for dinner?
Six for dinner?

6. Red Rocks is really high.

Everyone has heard that Denver is the Mile High City. What does that really mean though? I’ve been to Denver so I will let you know what that means. It means there is not much air there and what there is, is very dry. Red Rocks amphitheater which was built during the Depression, I’m sure as a public works project and not in the 80s for a U2 concert as I had previously believed; is about 20 miles from Katie’s so we went to see it.

Part of my brother in the shot showing all the GodDam stairs.
It is a most impressive spot. That's a very big rock.
It is a most impressive spot. That’s a very big rock.

There is very little air at Red Rocks. So I was puzzled to spy cigarette butts while walking up all the goddam stairs to see the venue.  Really, there’s no air here and you are going with a smoke for the walk? I’m not judging, just astounded.

Here’s the really crazy shit about Red Rocks. It’s a gym.

Oh yeah, we could do pushups where there's air but what the hell fun is that?
Oh yeah, we could do pushups where there’s air but we thought this would make you feel shittier about yourself.
We like walking and stretching and lunging in places where there is no air.
We like walking and stretching and lunging in places where there is no air.
We are paying this man to teach us how to do body breaking workouts without oxygen. Because we are going to run a marathon on the moon.
We are paying this man to teach us how to do body breaking workouts without oxygen. Because we are going to run a marathon on the moon.

Red Rocks taught me the reason why the windows on airplanes don’t open. People need air.

7. I Saw Bob Dylan in a Speedo!

Oh wait, no I didn’t. But I met Judy and she has seen Bob Dylan in a Speedo. I knew Speedo and I would hit it off and I was RIGHT and there is nothing I love more than being right. OK being right and air. I love those two things. And I love Speedo. Couple things you can tell about her from her blog….she’s cute and really funny. What you can’t tell is she is REALLY funny and REALLY pretty. Her boyfriend Jeff is also really funny and cute. They are a great pair. We could have chatted for more hours than we did and we chatted for hours and immediately upon meeting agreed that these kids play their music too damn loud and had to go outside.

Look at Speedo! I met Speedo!
Look at Speedo! I met Speedo!
One more time ladies, with teeth!
One more time ladies, with teeth!

17 thoughts on “7 Things I Learned on My Trip to Denver

  1. Your sister’s condo has an incredible view! – Albeit a blurry incredible view at night but what do you expect for $1250 including utilities?

    You look extra thin in the teeth picture. You should market that.

  2. As a NYC-metro area resident, I CANNOT with that view and that price. #MovingToDenverASAP

    Also, I’m not craving ALL the turkey/thanksgiving foods after seeing #5!

    1. Can you believe that rent?!
      Yeah, but then you would live in Denver, which has a large gay community and they have dance parties right by Katie’s house so she can listen to the music but it is still very flat and not NYC.

  3. Thanks for taking us along, Maggie. We’ve been to Denver and I thought I was going to dry up! My mouth, eyes, throat — everything and then the elevation, when you’re not used to it — holy shite! We went to a wedding where a granola-type person (not that there’s anything wrong with eating granola) told me to chew on raw ginger in one of those I’m-from-Denver-and-vegetarian-and-you’re-not kind of condescending tones. Had I had any saliva in my mouth, I would have told where to put her raw ginger. Kidding. But really, it is dry and I don’t know how people become used to it! Which one are you exercising there on those stairs?

  4. From this post and the comments if I visit Denver, Maggie, I’d instantly turn into a pile of dust. If I were the type who had a bucket list — I’m not, but I do have an actual bucket (full of household cleaning supplies), visiting Denver would not be on it.

  5. I appreciated the lunges at Red Rocks! Too funny! I haven’t been to Denver, but when I do go, I will be taking my inhaler. Lol! I look forward to hearing about your marathon to the moon! 😉

    1. That’s what I forgot, an inhaler, I had my nose spray but no asthma medication. Probably because I don’t have asthma but I think they should just hand out inhalers when you arrive at the airport!

  6. Yay!!! I run the stairs at Red Rocks…it is a ‘thing’. I grew up near there and I LOVE that place. IT WAS SO FUN TO MEET YOU!! Sorry about the dryness and the air. We are planning a trip to come see you!!!!! yay!!!! Me and my cuteness and Jeff and his cuteness. We’ll have a big quiet sleepover. YAY!!!!

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