Why I Must Have a New Job

The following is why I need to do fundraising and not be an office secretary/receptionist/administrative  whatever you want to call it.

On December 18 I received an email from my boss asking me to make nine CD copies of conference materials from a conference he attended in Rotterdam in November.

I didn’t read the email because I had taken off 14th and 17th of December and then had to take the 18th off to get Mitch out of Trembling Hills.  (Please refer back to ex-husband sobriety story that I haven’t written yet).  I didn’t read many emails from the first couple of weeks of December because I was gone or preoccupied with personal matters and I don’t expect to get emails in the office asking me to do something because I don’t really do anything here. I don’t do anything here that has to do with the job I was hired to do. I do plenty of blogging and emailing regarding other matters.

So I didn’t read my emails, so sue me. My boss asks a few days later if I received the email with subject line: “CD help”. I’m sure I received it and I’m equally sure I deleted it without reading it. I figure if he needed something, he would have taken care of it before I returned.

Nope, he still needed me to make nine copies of the conference material.

Here goes me trying to be an administrative assistant:

1. Find blank CDs that aren’t DVDs.

2. Figure out which slot is for reading CDs and which is for burning CDs.

3. Find documents that need to be copied.

4. Copy documents to a CD and then check CD to see if I actually did it. I did.

5. Realize I should make labels for the CDs or at least realize that is what I’m expected to do so I order CD labels and CD mailers from Office Depot.

Wait for delivery. When delivered, put new office supplies aside and think about it another day.

6. Figure out how to print on CD labels, succeed in printing and applying labels to CDs.

7. Put all CDs in mailers and seal ’em up!

8. Read original email and find that it says boss wants enclosure letter.

Set aside till after New Years.

10. Type up memos for each of the nine recipients. Print them in color so logo looks pretty.

11. Open all mailers, insert memo and reseal with packing tape, hoping recipients don’t notice that I have ripped open and re-taped the packages. Apply pre-printed address labels.

12. Boss gives me the two memos he wanted to put personal notes on and asks if I changed the names on the greetings for each memo or are they all addressed to “Ray”?

13. Mother of Christ! Must go buy more CD mailers.

14. Job should be taken care of by close of business today.  So that’s less than two weeks.

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47 thoughts on “Why I Must Have a New Job

  1. Anonymous says:

    So glad that I told your boss that you’d be “perfect” for the job. No wonder dead animals keep turning up on my doorstep.

  2. Margarita says:

    Ah, yes, some things don’t change, Maggie. The tools and techniques may change, but the essence remains grunt work! lol 😉 Now that you’ve got the crap out of the way, here’s to a better year! xoxoM

  3. Brigitte says:

    Dear gawd, woman — you are so beyond this. Here’s to finding your bliss (and your new job) in 2013.

  4. LOL! You are nothing if not professional. 😉
    Seriously, I’m with Brigitte. You’re way beyond this. At least it’s good for some laughs. The Carol Burnett clip – soo funny!

  5. JackieP says:

    wow, took me back to my years as “administrative assistant”. I got a new job also. 🙂

  6. Here’s to a lucky 2013, Maggie. I hope it goes up from here.

  7. Hellosailor says:

    I got too step 2 and it made my brain hurt :S xox

  8. GiRRL_Earth says:

    That is my favorite Carol Burnett skit. Thanks for the walk down memory lane.

  9. oh gawd it sounds like my job – I’m over it too ! ha ha ha

  10. artyelf says:

    Ah . . . it looks ‘lika you’re workin atta da Looney Toons!’ 😯
    Get out of there Mags, pick up your nail polish and clear your desk ~ you’re meant for better things. ♡

  11. dorkdad says:

    I won’t let my front-office manager call herself a “secretary”, though others might. She is way too valuable to be saddled with any stereotypes that come with that title.

    …and I would *NEVER* ask her to do anything official on her down time.

    /badboss

    -DD

  12. El Guapo says:

    You should personalize your desk the way I did to make the job more bearable.
    One day, you’ll have a perfect sized Maggie O.C. head-shaped divot in your desk from banging against it!
    (Mine is my pride and joy.)

  13. Addie says:

    I always aspired to be Mrs. A-Wiggins. Now, I hope to be you one day. You are the wind beneath my wings!

  14. Loved this Lame Adventure of yours Maggie! This was my favorite part:

    12. Boss gives me the two memos he wanted to put personal notes on and asks if I changed the names on the greetings for each memo or are they all addressed to “Ray”?

    13. Mother of Christ! Must go buy more CD mailers.

  15. unfetteredbs says:

    grunting right along with you Maggie. I love my REAL job just not the “dancing puppet” part– sigh. USPS has matching divots across country–
    Hang in there and get the resume pumping
    thanks for the laugh though.

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