House Plants

When I was a hot, happening teen in the late 70s and early 80s, I had plants in my room. Oh yeah baby, I had plants. I had an African violet, a Christmas cactus, spider plants — those super cool plants that would grow more spider plants and hung from sweet jute macrame plant hangers. I had a jade plant and some kind of airy fern thing. Back then it was cool to have a room full of plants and I had yet to discover that I actually love gardening and growing things outside where they belong.

I can’t stand house plants.

While my mom was sick but still quite lucid, she told me I had to keep her houseplant. Gah…. I hate houseplants. But what am I going to do? Death bed request from my mother: “Maggie you have got to take that plant, your father brought it to the hospital the day you were born.” Oh jeeezzze, no gettin’ around that. So I have the damn plant in my bathroom.

Here’s a little tour of my bathroom decor:

Picture my dad got me in San Francisco when I was very little because I had a black lab named Never.
September Morn picture that was in the “girls” bathroom when we were growing up. All other siblings too creeped out by it to take it.
Cute bird tin things.
The Plant.

I watered the damn thing this morning and water went all over the floor so that’s why that towel is there. See the little pot to the left of the plant that now holds pretty boxes of matches? That is what the plant originally came in. You know what kind of plant this is? It is an Agave americana. Or a 100 year plant. 100 years. You know what that means? Annie? Brigid? Here’s your house plant. heh heh heh

40 thoughts on “House Plants

  1. I accidentally killed N’s houseplants while he was in India because I forgot about them. They were over in the corner of the room, partially hidden by our Scotch Table, so I never actually watered them for six weeks.


      1. That is exactly what it is. We collect fine scotches. Last year at Christmas, we accidentally bought each other bottles of Johnnie Walker Blue Label.

        To quote Ron Burgundy: “I love scotch. Scotchy scotch scotch. There it goes down; down into my belly; mm mm mm.”

        You’re right. Serves those plants I murdered right.

  2. unfetteredbs

    your bathroom is far more glamorized than mine ๐Ÿ™‚ .. love that you can pass the plant on to your girls. What goes around eh?

    1. It’s a fairly new bathroom b/c the old one had floors that swelled up from the cracked tub and toilet secret leaking ๐Ÿ™‚
      Yep, ladies, drive me crazy now but in the end, you get the plant.

  3. I like your pictures. Especially the one that everyone was too creeped out to take. But yeah taking care of plants is a hassle. It’s better to have them outside where nature can do it’s thing.
    I don’t mind having plants in my house, but I don’t like all the little bugs that are attracted to them!

  4. I have one plant. it’s one of those bent up tiny bamboo plants rooted in little rocks. I can forget to water it for a month and it won’t die. My kids are on their own and when my cat died we decided no more pets. Guess what? I love it! When we go on a trip we just lock the door. I’m a selfish bastard with no responsibilities. I love me.

    1. Someday I will follow in your footsteps but for now, we’re getting another cat this weekend. Derwood and I will have three girls, one giant dog, one cat, one kitten and one plant.

  5. haha! When I saw the plant I cracked up. 100 years! Oh my gosh. Such a conflict! I would feel guilty killing it, too, but then I might rationalize that your mom now knows, from her new vantage point, that it’s such a hassle and she wants you to be happy. I might also think to donate it to a nursing home where they could love and care for it. Yes? Okay, keep the damn thing. I tried. ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. artyelf

    ๐Ÿ˜† Love this! ๐Ÿ˜€
    I too hate house plants, they belong in a garden, but apparently it’s good for us to have plants in the house. :mrgreen:

    Gosh! I remember those macramรฉ pot hangers, and do you remember the owls? Hate to tell you this, but macramรฉ is making a comeback ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

    BTW: The name Agave derives from the word agaue, meaning either princess, noble or illustrious – so what a gift your mother has given you!

    And enough of this ‘When I was’ palaver – you’re now a Hot, Happening Fortiesh Flapper – join the Flapper Club with me, and embrace your inner flower child! ๐Ÿ˜†

    P.S. I agree with the other siblings, that print is super creepy! ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

    1. hahaha, yeah i can see how that print might not be one of your faves.

      And yes I have noticed that macrame is coming back. Are your referring to macrame owls? Or are you referring to high fashion owls like the ones I had on a pantsuit in the 4th grade?

  7. Common names for that plant is also Mother in law’s tongue and Snake plant. Really hard to kill them. I had one and it got huge. I got tired of taking care of it and it was so big that somehow I managed to kill it. Hmmm…

  8. O Maggie. What a beautiful plant. It fits so well with the other things in your bathroom! And for 100 years? Wow, you must be so excited! (If you want to leave it in the front yard for me to sweep up ‘by accident’, I’ll take the blame and no-one will suspect a thing).

  9. Plants come to my house to die. My house is a hospice for plants. No amount of love, care and attention can give them the will to stay alive. I have a sign on my house, “Plants? Pushing daisies more like.”

  10. Pingback: Water retaining crystals – yay or nay? « Flowery Prose

  11. As our modern houses and flats are provided with all manner of comforts such as open-plan interiors, picture windows and thermostatically controlled central heating, it is not surprising that the interest in tropical house plants is very much on the increase. Providing sufficient care and attention is paid to their individual needs, these more exotic house plants will thrive in the home.

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