Everyone’s talking about nothing because these are the Blog Days of Summer.
What shall I write about?
My job is mindless. It’s nice outside so I’m bitter about being inside. The other day I sat for an extra couple of minutes in my car staring down at my Altoids tin to avoid walking into the building with a co-worker who had just pulled into the parking lot. I then left my keys in the car and the car unlocked which I didn’t discover until I was leaving work for the day. I still have the car… and the keys, with me, in my purse.
Yesterday I followed a WordPress blog called The Daily Post, which I guess is supposed to give you writing ideas. Today’s was about parenting blogs. Meh. I’m not going to write one but if you want to read a good one, read this. I have just recently followed Just Begin From Here. She’s a good writer and this is a very touching piece for anyone who’s ever loved a newborn baby.
Sssssooooo, what to write… hmmm…. Hey! Why not work on the media package you want to put together regarding the programs at Juvie? Nah, that’s not funny.
Check my email.
Without having to look very far or even in my spam folder, I found emails with these subject lines:
From Groupon: 54% off toothbrush sanitizer + anti-aging serum, jeggings and more! How do all those things go together? What is toothbrush sanitizer and why would it go with the anti-aging serum? And if you’re aging, you have no business wearing jeggings. Even if you’re younging, you have no business wearing jeggings.
From Groupon: Silk facial peels. I don’t know what this means. No, I didn’t read the offer! My time is valuable, I can’t be reading entire paragraphs on Silk Facial Peels! Sheesh, get off me!
These I did find in my Gmail Spam Folder. I don’t ever use the Gmail account. I opened it when we moved and my Comcast email wasn’t working. That was 7 years ago but I still have this address. No one I know uses it.
Important Gmails I have received:
- Know your score instantly. click here to get your Free* Credit Score Now! I think that little asterisk means it’s free for those who give them some money.
- Protect against bed bugs. OK. Gawd I hope I don’t have bed bugs. I know Bed Bugs are no laughing matter but really spam about Bed Bugs?
- Find Sincere Jewish singles in your area! I get a variety of dating emails. I’m glad they are hooking me up with Sincere Jews, I can’t stand those Jewish singles who are just full of shit.
- Help Counsel Suffering Addicts. Oh yeah, this is just what Suffering Addicts need. Some counseling time with Maggie and her box of wine and Marlboro Lights. “You know, you might need to relax, you appear to be suffering, do you wanna drink?”
- Got a Skintag or Mole and needit gone? Hell yeah, I needit gone! (that is not a typo, apparently when you have a skintag or mole you needit gone!) And where better to find someone to cut something off your body than the internet?
- Find local Asian Singles. See Free profiles and photos. OK. Thank you.
- Receive gift with AARP membership. I’m signing up, who cares if I’m only 47, I want the gift. Which is probably going to be a case of Ensure.
- Earn a $100 Taco Bell gift card! This one kind of bummed me out because I have to EARN the $100 Taco Bell gift card. I want to WIN a $100 Taco Bell gift card and then I want to WIN a year’s supply of Imodium which will deal with my Irritable Bell Syndrome.
- Customer Service Announcement regarding American Stationery’s new website. It’s coming soon. This one wasn’t spam and yes, I’ll let you know.
- And from the Best Sex Ever— More Women Just For You! I have no idea what I have done that has led Gmail to believe that I’m a Jewish, Asian, Man or Lesbian. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, I just don’t feel like it’s my demographic.
That’s it. Clearly I’m going to have to do some serious assing out soon or I will have to shut down this blog. Any ideas? anyone? Bueller?